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I am workaholic; something inherited, and of course then fuelled by a rather demanding job.  I realised a few years ago that I thrive in high pressure, high energy situations (or at least I used to tell myself that). The problem with living in this constant gear of high drama is that sooner or later it takes its toll, and can become incredibly tiring. The need for balance is something that has been weighing strongly on me in recent months.

This past weekend I decided to take what is termed a “Strategic Time-Out” (those that are cricket fans will understand). A strategic timeout can be taken during a cricket match for a team to regroup and change tactics if they see that the match is not going their way. It’s a short intermission during the game, whose main purpose is to alter the performance of the team and hopefully the outcome of the game in the team’s favour. For a while I’ve been feeling the urge and desire to just switch off for a few days, and take a break from my life, and regroup as it were. During a conversation with one of my directors I expressed how tired I was (mentally, emotionally, and physically).  To my surprise he offered me a “weekend pass” to get away from it all, all expenses paid. I couldn’t believe it, but I quickly realised that it was the direct answer to my prayers, and grabbed this blessing with both hands. Ever the planner, I already knew what I wanted to do, and where I wanted to go. The dream was to spend a relaxed weekend in the Kruger, see some game, rejuvenate at a Spa, and feel spoilt...hehehehehe... But yeah, not one to rip off my boss with a massive bill at a Five-Star facility, I decided to look closer to home, and was pleasantly surprised that for less than a third of the Kruger prices, I could do everything I wanted to do right here in Swaziland. The two days away from it all were great, a true gift. Yes, God is amazing!

 I’ve sometimes wondered what I would do if I could cause time to stand still, or change the direction of certain events in my life. Though I know I can’t make time stand still, I decided that it was important to have these few days of me being still. Apart from the obvious need for rest, I also desired that this would be an opportunity for real personal time for me, without the distraction of phone calls, laptops, even friends and family. I really needed to be alone with only my thoughts, and my bible, and re-view things as it were.  To some extent try to re-arrange things a little bit in my life so that the outcome tomorrow will be the most favourable, centred in God’s will for me. I felt desperate to get answers or solutions to issues that i am facing. A pow-wow with God, out of which i would emerge with a 10 point plan on how i was going to change my life!

We often get bogged down with the whole life routine. We focus on what is wrong, what is not working right, what is getting us down, and as a result we forget that there is a much bigger picture, of which we’re an integral part. We can’t actually stop the clock, but we can choose to stop, take a step back to gain a bit of perspective, and ask for God in His wisdom to direct us in the steps that we need to take to get us moving forward. There’s a beautiful song written by ‘70’s radical evangelist the late Keith Green “How Majestic is Thy Name” based on Psalm 8. It talks of the beauty of creation, everything that God has done and created. It then talks about man, and asks “What is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him”? In those solitary days of rest, I started asking myself that question. As His child he cares for me, my situation, my circumstances, my fears, etc. he made me a little lower than the Angels, he has given me dominion over the works of His hands, and put all things under my feet. I like what Hebrews 2:6(Amp) says “What is man that you are mindful of him, or the son of man that You graciously and helpfully care for and visit and look after him?” Surrounded by the incredible beauty of the African Bush, life in symphony: the birds, the trees, the river, the breeze, even the little gecko in my room; I had the realisation that God keeps it all going.  Every moment of each day, he sustains the beauty and life that surrounds us. Every creature has a purpose and a role to play. For each, God has made provision and anticipated its needs.  If he cares so much for nature and its creatures; how much more then for me, and the concerns and worries that i have? (Matthew 6 echoes the same sentiment).

Refreshed, recharged, re-energised and armed with nuggets of wisdom from God’s word, I head back to my life to resume “play”. The question is no longer how can I implement/re-engineer another strategy to get the outcome that I want; but rather it has been transformed to “How can I fulfil my part, play my God-appointed role in the greater orchestra that is life, and do it in a way that reflects, that i understand that He cares for and is mindful of me?”  This is the strategy that was birthed from my “Strategic Time-out”. The more I ask this of myself, the less I find myself worrying about things/life breaking down, because I have the confidence as well as the knowledge that the sustainer of life is ever attentive in relation to everything that concerns me.