Lessons from My Grandmother

I just love this picture taken of my granny and i during my last Zim visit. I don’t have many pictures with my grand-mother especially one taken during my adult years, so this is one to print out, frame and cherish. I can’t quite remember what we were chuckling about, but i know that it was something good J

In January 2012, we received a rather alarming phone-call that my grandmother was very sick. She had been diagnosed with a hyper-thyroid, for which she was receiving treatment to bring it’s hyperactivity back to normal levels. During Christmas 2011 her medication had run out, and this had caused her to regress a great deal. My mom had just returned from the US, and she too had been dished with her own set of life-altering diagnoses – High Cholesterol and Type 2 Diabetes.  We set out for Zim, not at all sure what we would find when we got to Rusape, all the while praying for God to intervene in the situation.

When we got to my granny’s place after 2 days of travelling, I have to be honest and say that what i was witnessing was someone who was on the brink of death. She could no longer walk, couldn’t keep food down, and was in state of delirium, which was brought on by high blood pressure and fever. That first night we hardly slept, as we were not sure she would make it through the night. I found myself thrust into a situation where i had to have a tough skin or as my granny would put it “moyo mukobvu” as only God knew what the next day held in store.  God in his faithfulness intervened and we spent the rest of that week, travelling between Harare and Rusape, going for Doctor’s appointments, getting new prescriptions filled out etc. At the end of the week as were about to return to Swaziland, it looked as though my granny would be fine. Sadly because of the setback in her treatment she had to start her 6-month treatment plan again, so that she would be ready for surgery later in the year, an operation that would remove the overgrown goitre that she had, and would finally set her on the road to recovery.

Fast-forward to September 2012, we returned to Rusape, to find that she had made exceptional progress. She was walking without any assistance, her vitality and appetite were back to normal, and she was eager (totally eager) to have this surgery and be free of this illness that had been plaguing her for the past few years.  She had made sufficient progress that after the Dr’s exam and blood tests it was all systems go for her to have the operation. By the end of that month, she had pulled through a 5 hr operation and was on her way to a full recovery. All this at the age of 74! I have to admire her bravery and determination to live. Praise God.

The lessons I gained through this experience are the following:

·         Be resolute in your faith, never give up! No matter how daunting and dark a situation maybe, you need to believe that there will be light at the end of the tunnel. I learnt that it is so crucial to hold onto hope, despite what the physical evidence is plainly telling you. Hope is the only state of mind where one can retain faith and believe that things will work out

·         The people that are there for you in times of trouble are a direct result of how you have lived your life. I was so amazed at the number of people that came to visit my granny whilst we were in Harare before and after her operation. The moment that people heard that “ambuya vaNyasha variko muHarare” (Nyasha’s granny is in town) the phone-calls wouldn’t stop. We were entertaining people almost every day. Many of them were relatives, some family friends. Some of these people even made the journey to visit my granny in hospital after her surgery. This showed me that over the course of her life, my granny has been able to cultivate goodwill and genuinely loving relationships with so many people. She’s had a positive influence in so many of their lives, so much so that they would remember her in her time of need. What a legacy!

·         God is truly there with us in all things. My granny has been an Angilcan most of her life. But i believe that this journey that she had to walk with this illness opened her to that personal knowledge of Jesus Christ as her saviour. She spoke many times of how she now knows for sure that there is a God. So many times we know of God, but we miss actually knowing Him. The lesson i got here was that God is ever calling us into that personal relationship with him, doesn’t matter how many years have gone by. He never leaves nor forsakes us.

·         Do not be too proud to ask for help. It’s interesting how some life situations bring us to that point where we must depend on others. There is no shame in asking for that helping hand; in fact those that love you are already willing to lend their assistance, even without being asked. When we’re too proud to ask for help, often that is when we set ourselves sup for a fall.

·         Laughter lightens the load. I love my granny’s sharp wit and quick tongue. There is never a dull moment...lol... Even as she was probably faced with many doubts and fears, she maintained a positive attitude through laughter and comic relief. It was interesting how she was also able to make light of her illness (a coping mechanism no doubt) so that those around her wouldn’t fall into a sombre/depressed mind-set about the whole thing. (I can only imagine what she may truly have been feeling.) Of her own initiative she decided that the best way to cope with the situation was by injecting some lightness so it would be easier to carry the burden.

·         Life’s too short to remain angry and hold a grudge. It was once said by a Pst at church during my varsity days that “Eternity is only one breath away”. It’s an art to recognise that you must forgive, and do so quickly, for your own peace of mind. A lot of the time the things we hold onto for years, become toxic even to us. Best thing is to let it go...”kungo zvisiya zvakadaro” as my granny would say, and move on. Life is a precious gift that we need to savour and cherish, because we never know how much of it we actually have left. Forgiving others is key to us enjoying our days.

There is so much more i can write, but will leave it there for now. I feel blessed to have been a part of this chapter in my granny’s life. I feel privileged that i was able to spend so much time with her, watching listening, learning and mostly enjoying her company. I am grateful that she is alive, and strong. She has beaten the odds and she has the fire of life still burning strongly within her. I am honoured to have such a robust woman of strength, who has seen life in all its colours as part of my lineage. It’s all been by God’s grace. I have so much more to learn and glean from her still. God-willing there’ll be many more days spent with her...